Trump Redraws Thailand-Cambodia Border With Sharpie, Declares 'Problem Fixed'
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Former President Donald Trump announced Tuesday that he has personally resolved the decades-long territorial dispute between Thailand and Cambodia over the Preah Vihear temple, using nothing but a black Sharpie marker and a printed map from his Mar-a-Lago study.
The ancient conflict, which has sparked military clashes and international court rulings since the 1960s, was settled in under 15 minutes, according to Trump, who shared a satellite image on Truth Social showing a fresh, wobbly line bisecting the contested Khmer temple complex. “I looked at that map—total disaster, fake news borders—and I fixed it,” Trump said during a rally in Florida. “Now it’s beautiful. Thailand gets the pagoda, Cambodia gets the gift shop. No more fighting. You’re welcome, world.”
Thai Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin expressed cautious optimism, stating in a Bangkok press conference, “While we appreciate Mr. Trump’s… artistic intervention, our maps don’t match this version. But if it brings peace and perhaps a Trump Tower on the new line, who are we to complain?”
Cambodian officials, however, were less enthused, calling the redraw “an imperial squiggle” that inexplicably awards them a strip of the Gulf of Thailand. The International Court of Justice has yet to comment, but sources say they’re rushing to procure their own set of markers.
