New Israeli Defense Minister Israel Yisrael ben-Israel Israeli 'Most Israeli Person Ever'

TEL AVIV — Netanyahu has today chosen Labor Party politician Israel Yisrael ben-Israel Israeli as a successor to former Israeli defence minister Israel Katz, after Katz retired last week to pursue his lifelong dream of opening a waterpark in the Seychelles.

New Minister ben-Israel Israeli is reportedly the ‘most Israeli person that Netanyahu could find’, a trait that is expected to help his image inside the country. “It is like if the Americans had a politician called Mister Cowboy Burger Everyman,” a Knesset insider told our reporters. “Israel Katz was a fine man, but recent events proved definitively he was simply not Israeli enough, and so we had to take drastic action.”